Friends vs. Foes

Jeff and I recently went to Barnes and Noble. I do believe we are the customers that the employees hate. We pile up around ten books collectively, find a comfy spot, and sit and browse the books. When all is said and done, we maybe buy three. Oops.

Well, one of the books I was musing over was "The Conception Chronicles." It was a cute book, but had more info on the beginning aspects of infertility, and as we are already broken in and well accustomed to the world of infertility, I didn't feel the need to buy it. Instead I bought a book called, "A Few Good Eggs: Two chicks dish on overcoming the insanity of infertility." So far it is awesome. I really like reading others thoughts and experiences with infertility. Heck, if I didn't, I wouldn't have known that my doctor wasn't doing what she was supposed to be doing, and we probably would still be stuck with a bad RE!

Anyway, when I was reading "The Conception Chronicles," the authors spoke of the different people that you will encounter going through the frustrating TTC days, and how there are Fertility Friends and Fertility Foes. One of these descriptions stuck out in my mind. They called them, ' the professor'. This person, though never experiencing a miscarriage or going through any sort of IF has an answer for EVERYTHING. I have an acquaintance like this. If I would only take her advice (which I didn't ask for) and use it, then none of this would be a big deal, and nothing good, baby or otherwise, will happen in my life until I take said advice. I wish I would have known that this was something that lots of people go through. It would have saved me a lot of time and energy feeling guilty and crazy. I honestly thought for some time, that I was the problem. I was the one being too sensitive. I actually had some of these people, when I confronted them about why they were being such a &*%$#, tell me that I needed to grow a thicker skin.

I was talking about this very thing with a good friend recently, and she shared what someone told her...that there are some people who ask how things are going because they genuinely want to know, and then there are those that ask because they like to hear of someone who has more problems than they do. I had never thought about it that way before, but I think she is right. It hit me like a ton of bricks (in a good way), because there are those certain people in your life that ask how you are, but you can tell they really don't care...I never had a label for those people before, but now it all makes sense!

All of this brings me around to thanking those people who I consider true friends, whether I have known you five minutes, five months, or five years, know that you have mattered to me, and helped to shape who I am today. TDJ, AR, AF, LO, CB, HH, SC, and I know there are more I can't think of right now, If you need anything, I am always here for you. The picture is one of my closest friends, my brother, with me at my wedding.

"You've got troubles, I've got 'em too.

There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you.

We'll stick together to see it through,

cause you've got a friend in me."

- Randy Newman